Late in June at County Hospital, there were only two palliative care patients for me to see, so Clementine sent me to the ICU, where there were at least three horrible situations: a PVA (pedestrian versus automobile) accident that had resulted in brain death; a young parent accidentally caught in gang crossfire, also brain dead; the savage beating of a young woman.
I went into one room to find a doctor comforting the sister of one of the brain-dead patients. The doctor had taken the sister tenderly in her arms and was crooning into her ear. It was a tour de force of compassion, particularly given that the doctor probably has to do this five times a week. The sister was weeping, and then said, resolutely, “I’m going to let you do what you need to do,” by which she meant withdraw life support.
It’s impossible to know, but I wonder how it would have gone if the doctor had stood six feet away with her arms folded, saying, “There’s nothing more we can do.” Maybe then the sister would have yelled the words heard very often around the ICU: “Well, you’re not going to pull the plug! You’re not going to give up on her!”
One morning at the end of my 24-hour on-call shift at my paying job, I spoke to the person taking over. Fred asked, “How are you?” I said, “Oh, fine,” and then I added, “except for my right knee, which is killing me.” I’m not sure why I said that, and I expected Fred to say, “Sorry to hear that,” and that would be the end of the conversation. Instead, he said, “What’s the history of this problem? Where does it hurt?”
He told me that he had once been in an accident that had given him knowledge of such matters, and he hypothesized that my kneecap was being mashed against the joint. He said that when he had a similar problem, an acupuncturist treated the twin indentations under the kneecap known as the “calf’s nose.” This was helpful, but Fred figured there was no reason he needed to pay an expert to do this, so he went and bought his own acupuncture needles, boiled them in water, and stuck them in the indentations under his knee, with good results.
I was going to call my PCP the very next day for a referral to physical therapy, but when I thought about what Fred had said, it explained my symptoms exactly. Accordingly, I began doing quad stretches many times a day, and there was immediate improvement. A couple of days later, I went to have a massage, and my massage person worked on my right quads and suggested putting arnica gel on my knee, along with Tiger Balm and CBD oil, either spaced out or all at once. He said arnica is good for sore muscles, and the other two are good for inflammation, but via different compounds, so it’s worth it to use both. (Actually, all three are good for inflammation.)
Thus I found myself on the phone to the nearest marijuana dispensary, placing my very first order. I looked at their website before I called and couldn’t believe how many products they have. I explained that I wanted CBD oil without THC and the helpful employee pointed out various options and said she’d put my order in a bag for pickup. I’d thought I would have to provide my full name and address, or even show ID, but I only had to give my first name.
The next time I discussed my knee with Fred, he had more suggestions, including that I should go see the chiropractor in my PCP’s office, who Fred thinks is wonderful. I said, “Is he going to mess up my spine?” I had never in my entire life seen a chiropractor, but this one really is wonderful. Friendly and enthusiastic, he explained what was going on, released various frozen spots, and gave me some additional exercises to do at home. He said it was not in fact a case of my kneecap being mashed against the joint, but rather patella tracking disorder, due to a ligament that he said is slightly “lax.” He explained why stretching my quads helped. He said my focus does not need to be on growing cartilage but rather on lessening inflammation. My knee is not entirely better—maybe this is now a chronic situation of occasional achiness and stiffness—but it’s much improved and I can walk pretty much like a person who can walk.
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