Glossary

BBT: Bad Body Thought. Example: "Ugh, look at my fat thighs." The suggested remedy is decoding; see below.

Demand feeding: Feeding ourselves as we would an infant. That is, feeding ourselves when we are hungry, giving ourselves the food that is the best match for our hunger, and stopping when we are no longer hungry. The idea here is that chronic dieting has severed the relationship between food and physical hunger; demand feeding seeks to restore that relationship.

Decoding: After enough negative focus on our bodies, we become accustomed to blaming everything on them and expressing our anxieties via criticisms of our size or shape or what we ate. After a while, we ourselves aren't aware that Fat Language is concealing our true concerns. When we notice that we are having a BBT, we can apologize to ourselves, and ask who says? Who says the only good kind of belly is a flat one? Who says smaller is more lovable than bigger? Is a small cat more lovable than a big one? Is a small tree more beautiful than a big one? Finally, we can use the very language of the BBT to figure out what is really on our minds. "My belly sticks out too far" might just mean "I really stood out in the meeting at work this morning when I said what I thought we should do." Maybe we fear that we are sticking out; maybe it has nothing to do with our bodies.

FFF: Formerly forbidden food--food that was forbidden when one was dieting.

Glitter: The allure of an enticing still-sort-of-forbidden food.

IC, or Inner Caretaker: A kindly aspect of our own psyches that can provide attuned care and comforting as we develop our relationship with him/her/it.

Legalizing: Making all foods legal, none forbidden, with a carrot having the same moral weight as a piece of chocolate cake. Best achieved through reminding ourselves that no food is forbidden any longer, and through stocking up.

Matching: Figuring out what food is the best match for SH. This can be done by picturing how different foods will feel in your stomach, or imagining how you'll feel after eating certain foods.

MH: Mouth hunger, or non-physical (emotional) hunger for food.

OO: Short for Overcoming Overeating.

Overcoming Overeating: A no-diet approach to ending obsession with food and weight described by Jane R. Hirschmann and Carol H. Munter in their books Overcoming Overeating and When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies. If you are only going to read one, read the latter.

SH: Stomach hunger: actual, physical hunger for food. Carol and Jane say that when we eat from SH, we demonstrate to ourselves that an attuned caretaker is on the job; enough instances of feeding from SH and we will become calm enough to sit with our feelings and think about the best ways to handle our real problems.

Stocking up: Buying three times as much of an FFF as you could possibly eat in one day, and when your supplies drop to half that, buying more. So if you could eat two gallons of ice cream in a day if you put your mind to it, buy six. And when you're down to three, go restock.

Thin fantasy: A tool for uncovering anxiety about possibly becoming smaller through demand feeding. To do the thin fantasy, picture yourself becoming physically smaller. Notice the situation and if there is anything worrisome or difficult about it. Consider whether you had the same problem in your childhood, and how your IC might help you with that problem now.